I dont even know how to type right now. I have to push my brain to send a signal down to my fingers. Cold fingers. Cold brain. I can't stop shaking. My gut feels worse than just twisted into knots. Those knots have been sucked into some kind of miniature black hole clenching vigorously inside my chest. Not hungry but weak from malnourishment I keep trying to eat...ugh, what an awful activity digestion is...
I can't do it, I can't do it, I can't do it...
I feel like I need to breakdown, just cry and cry and cry, but the tears don't make it out of my ducts.
Ahhh!! Why do I feel this horrible? Why?!
I've lost all my senses. I just can't focus, I can't do it, I can't do it...
How did I even make it through this week? When can I just collapse? How can I not already collapse? Really, its too late...its already happened...
I can't do anything.
I don't know how to beat this one. I guess I just have to accept defeat... is that bad? Should I be trying to stick this one out?? Why right now does it seem like everyone keeps saying persistence is how you succeed in life? At any cost? Emotionally, physically, spiritually? Wheres the line?
Shiver while youre breathing...
No comments:
Post a Comment